Vote for Me! by Robin Palmer

Author:Robin Palmer
Language: eng
Format: epub, mobi
Publisher: Penguin Group USA, Inc.
Published: 2011-04-16T16:00:00+00:00

chapter 6

Dear Dr. Maude,

Okay, so here’s a question for you. Why is it that SOME people—i.e., Cristina Pollock—have lives where everything seems to go right for them? Like they have really long shiny hair? And their forehead barely ever breaks out? And they’re constantly number one in the Who Will Win the Seventh-Grade Class President Race? poll that Dinshaw Saigal set up on his blog and updates every hour because he’s really good with computers and has figured out a way to do that?

And then there are OTHER people—i.e., me—who have lives where it’s not just enough that they have to deal with ONE horrible thing (like constantly being number two on Dinshaw’s poll, which translates to last, since there are only two people running) but a BUNCH of horrible things. Like, say, a frister who talks to her only through her cat. And a father who is obsessed with babies who aren’t even here yet. And boobs that just keep growing. (The other night at dinner, Mom put down her fork and, in front of Alan, said, “Lucy, I can’t believe I’m saying this, but it looks like you’ve outgrown your new bra that we just got you a month ago!”)

Anyway, the reason I’m writing is because I have a favor to ask. Even though we’ve never met, I hope that you know me well enough to believe that I’d make an awesome class president. And because we’ve now gotten to the video portion of Operation Election, I thought maybe one day after school, we could come down to your apartment with a video camera and tape a little interview between you and me.

Like we could talk about the problem of Mean People–ism, and I could tell you how I plan to stop it and you could say stuff like “Lucy, those are all fantastic ideas, and if I were a seventh grader at the Center for Creative Learning, you’d definitely have MY vote!” (BTW, you don’t have to worry about memorizing any of that. We have a ton of poster board, so Malia’s going to write it all down in really big letters on cue cards for you because she’s got the best handwriting of all of us. Well, Laurel’s is even better than Malia’s, but because we’re not talking because she hates me, I can’t really ask her.)

If you’d be willing to do this, I’d be so so so SO grateful! Obviously, I can’t pay you for your time because Alan, who’s a lawyer, says it’s illegal to pay people to have them say that they’d vote for you. But I’d be happy to give you some extra buttons. For free. And obviously, if I am elected, I will make sure to give you a huge shout-out in my acceptance speech.

Let me know.

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